The elusive Family Doghouse A note about Genealogybank.com Who is the “dumb” one? … In bed! Solar Racers Go Fast Think you have every snowglobe? Think again Let’s talk about your bathroom… Grocery list in the corner pocket Cereal Mascots on the prowl Salty dog means whaaat? Parking tickets now pocket sized! Thanks for the informative emails! WHY the multiple bottles of stink perfume? Spread the love and/or marriage You would think he would have had a clue… This is not Hooters But can she cook? The line is still busy! Is it too much to ask? A better phone call experience? Bob has lost his edge I need tech support to pee? I lost the key, you can start it with a nail… Be careful what you wish for, coyote. Hellhounds!! Doris is watching you Be careful what you wish for… Across the big pond to Australia The Restless Mouse salutes G. “thumb twiddler” Gochanour How do the department store buyers do it? Some things just go out of style Sartorial splendor in a filthy warehouse So old farts like me can use the computer too… Arts and Crafts time Now with the candy pills… 15 gears, 14 wheels… and one eye? Ridiculous prediction from 1951 The birthday game is getting tame Annoying Orange Closeout- Just $2.49… better hurry on this one… DO NOT CALL LIST is about useless, but I found something that helps… Since 1998 A Voyage to Paradise Hey kids! Great back to school item! Ladies, you won’t like this Cellphone Fingerprint Reduction The postcard about the ladies at the beach! I would love to help you with your shoddy sneaker scenario, but… Groovy cellphone accessory Smells like nerd spirit What do we sell? How much time do you have? Getting around to it The old fart mug is tired. Maybe I should have said tiger? Just asking for a Dear John letter Retro Ugly Vase FOUND Don’t Sniffle! yet License plate game thwarted by state Don’t let a broken leg stop you! Drivers can do anything Dog, meet other dog. What are you doing?? I am king of my castle, my wife said that’s OK. Checks and Money Orders; how quaint. Domestic bliss in the kitchen? If Ethyl don’t mind, I will pay cash next time… Scruffy is like a gazelle Wee Willie Won’t Go home It’s like Match Game without Gene * Rayburn Craigslist Lessons Learned The Costcolypse Whimsical otter wears baseball cap backwards Pop-tarts are delicious despite sickly mascot Super Heroes doing the best they can I heart my dog’s head – Rebus fun Google Glasses are starting to make sense It’s boring to stay at the Y M C A Chronologically Impaired Rooster Fifty years of reading the comics, you find a bit of wisdom here and there. Time to reflect AKA photography is weird Big Foot meets Dr. Scholl The brotherhood of the expensive pants Picture Day means short or styled hair The Children of the Corn move to the suburbs Bejeweled is the new Parcheesi Bite me, Chipmunks; any kid can do that. Dreaming of biking, and swimming, and horseback riding… Almost time to enlist in the Army of Sandwiches and Dr. Pepper We’re DECIMATING our prices! Presidents of long ago bored with afterlife, apparently. Good Neighbors don’t smash That’s when the trouble started #27 Monopoly with a speed die; it turns evil It’s called MONOPOLY not MONOTONY A lady’s hat is blocking half the screen Speaking of overloaded purses A big bag of Shhh She probably can’t find her cellphone either. An accident waiting to happen No news is good news Frosty’s Revenge It’s what’s for dinner

A very poor Scrabble tile hand Playing Wordfeud with my sister, I have a really lousy hand here, there are five E tiles! I’ve almost cornered the market on the letter E for this game, the whole set only has 12. Should I hoard them to deny her access? Hate to swap tiles, but I don’t see much to work with here. I should go play Scrabble in the bathroom, because I’m about to have a vowel movement.

BY THE WAY… How is it that (Parker Brothers? Hasbro?) hasn’t sued them?
Is it because of the minor differences, such as the ability to put nonsense words up repeatedly until something sticks, or the crazy “random” board my sister Evelyn likes to play, where a person can get a seemingly insurmountable lead on the first turn? Or the frustrating inability to flip the board over and run out of the room crying?

Maybe they worked out some kind of deal. Anyway, I’m really glad it’s there, I really appreciate the chance to prove that at least two of my siblings, and now my nephew, they are all much smarter than me. It really brightens my day. Sometimes I manage to win against a guy from work, but he is 22 and his girlfriend recently moved in with him, so his mind isn’t really in the game.

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