Crunchy Nut Man Crunchy Nut Man– Kellogg’s has just created a new purported superhero. I’m a little skeptical. What exactly are his superpowers? Does it have something to do with that spoon on his forehead? What is his kryptonite? Who is his nemesis, maybe Ham and Eggs Man? Toast Girl?

I could scan it with my cellphone, but I suspect that I will be as disappointed as Ralphie with his secret decoder ring.

The cereal is delicious, and doesn’t hurt the roof of my mouth like the product endorsed by the other crunch-based cereal mascot, who shall remain nameless… because he does not exist in the Kellogg’s superhero universe.

LuckyCap36SQ200When I was a kid, I had “too many sisters” and thus was relegated to the eastern end of the large room in the basement, the rest of the room was occupied by a gargantuan billiard table. That was OK until friends & family came over to shoot pool until the wee hours. I made the best of it, I moved my dresser and bookshelf to what I judged to be the “property line”, but my mother or somebody would move it back against the wall while I was gone with the Schwinn.

One fun thing, there was Lucky beer, although I had no taste for it, I loved the puzzles inside the caps. Got to thinking about that, and consulted Mr. Google- Lo and behold, there are collectors. I found this awesome cap-trading site. This notation was especially touching;

On Feb. 26,2012, Skip from Kent, WA bought a Lucky cap, #36. “Easy come, easy go.” His friend who shared puzzle caps with him has died. His buddy was such a fan of the puzzles and always known to have a six-pack nearby for more puzzles to be solved. Skip wants this cap for this time of remembering.

My friend Mario passed away a while back, I can see how Skip would find some comfort in a little thing like that. But I’m getting maudlin*. Check out the complete set of Beer-cap Rebus puzzles at JokeLibrary.net. We are not affiliated with that site, we just like them.

* If I ever have a goth daughter, I am going to name her Maude Lynn.

I got a tournament-approved Monopoly “Speed Die” from a guy on ebay, we started a game using this third die today. Not sure if we will vote to use it in the future.

The speed die does one of four things, three of them good but the last one very bad!

  1. If the SD shows a one, two or three, you just add that to the other dice and move that much further. Good for getting back around to GO a little faster, I guess.
  2. If the SD shows a bus, you have more options where to stop; For example, if the regular dice show a one and a six, you can move one space, or six, or all seven. Unfortunately, this slows the game a bit as players evaluate their movement options.
  3. If the SD rolls a “Monopoly Man” aka Mr. Moneybags, and if there are unsold properties, after you take your regular move, you advance to the next unowned property. This would seem to speed up the game, but actually we have to go through a roll call every time; “Connecticut! Who owns it? Saint Charles- Does anybody own it?”
  4. If the SD rolls a “Monopoly Man” and all 28 properties are owned, then after you take your regular move, you advance to the next opponent’s property and pay rent; This could mean paying rent two, or even three times in one turn, if you rolled doubles twice and were especially unlucky. It speeds the process of eliminating players, but I don’t like the “piling on” aspect of it. Am I just not ruthless enough?

We recently saw a documentary on Netflix about tournament Monopoly players, and it inspired us to dust off the old Monopoly board, seeing as how is was miserable out and all four of us were home.

The idea was to come up with some house rules that make it easier and more fun to play, without compromising the ability to bankrupt opponents, and without tilting it too far away from “skill” and toward “luck”. We were only partially successful. Here are the rules that got a majority vote.

(NOTE: Rules were modified a bit after I got a tournament-approved “speed die” from a dude on ebay)

GENERAL GAME PLAY:

#1. Added a “real estate agent” and a “General Contractor”. The banker only handles money, other people deal out property deeds and buildings. This doesn’t seem to affect game play, or does it? Isn’t the banker who handles everything going to be a bit distracted?

#2. NO ONES. We eliminated the $1 bills and rounded up all rent totals. This eliminated one of my big objections to playing Monopoly, too much time spent “making change”.

#3. NO JAILHOUSE LANDLORDS. We decided that people in jail with Jake don’t have anyone on the outside to manage their financial affairs, so no rent collecting, no trading, they are incommunicado. It makes about as much sense as the regular Monopoly rule that doesn’t let you collect rent on mortgaged property. Just think what a rule like that would do to Donald Trump! Our “No Jailhouse Landlords” rule also discourages hiding in jail to avoid PAYING rent.

BONUS CASH: I am generally against bonus cash rules but I always get outvoted. Hence these house rules;

#4. Free Parking starts at zero, but Chance fines and jail fees, etc. get put in the free parking zone. What is this teaching the children?

#5. They also made a rule where you get an extra $100 for landing directly on GO. I was outnumbered.

PROPERTIES:

#6. The title cards get shuffled and each player gets 3 random properties “From a rich uncle who dies” at the start of the game. I am lobbying to get this thrown out. There are only 28 properties to be had, I think using the speed die gets the properties distributed quickly enough.

#7. The very last property gets thrown in the FREE PARKING pile. I successfully got this house rule thrown out, because it conflicts with the speed die instructions.

#8. Mortgages are interest-free, thanks to an imaginary stimulus program.

#9.Build anything. I grow weary of fussing with all the houses, so until I find some old Monopoly sets with wooden houses at a thrift store, glue the houses together to form duplexes, triplexes, and four-unit apartment buildings, “uneven building” is OK- You can have 2 empty lots and a hotel. That’s how it works in real life.

#10. Since we have multiple sets of buildings, there will be unlimited housing stock; but if you have to sell them back to the bank, it’s still at half price.

ROLLING DOUBLES:

If someone lands on a rental property on doubles, they have to pay rent. We tried the “But I wasn’t staying the night!” rule, it slows the game down. #11. There are unlimited doubles with no penalty. I think rolling doubles three times in a row constitutes “speeding” and there should be an option to just pay a $50 fine where you stand, or optionally go to jail. Too many people trotting off to jail gives a slight advantage to purple and orange property owners. (My son says: “All of a sudden you’re smarter than the Parker Brothers?”)

… So those are our new house rules, what are yours?

We had this video made for our old site, now it’s just RestlessMouse.com, no “that” in front. I dug it out as sort of a new year inspiration.

My tradition new year inspiration, is of course, Spike Jones:

While perusing the postcards, I often ascribe comments and activities that fit my view of the world. This is the result, if postcards were perfectly honest…

The Restless Mouse Command Center

I see Windows Eight has arrived ( They would do better if they call it “Windows Eight” instead of “Windows 8”- It implies horsepower ) – Frank Lee, I don’t see what the hoopla is about. It’s mainly a different screen and a different way to sell software, am I overlooking something important? I don’t need all of my software to be “apps”. That’s another thing, I know “Apps” is short for applications, but it’s also a big chunk of the word “Apple”. Perhaps it would be too Charlie Sheeen-esque to call them “Wins” instead.

Orange grove postcard

Call you mother! A postcard just isn’t good enough.

One of my favorite things about old postcards, the messages written on the back. When it’s not “The weather is nice, this place is beautiful, nyahh nyahh neener neener neener!”

This one someone sent to her mother, apparently they correspond only by mail; Dear mom- Received your letter. Jim was to tell you about our moving, but your letter didn’t sound as if you knew. I thought he had called both you and Elsie and Frank. We are all packed, moving May 2nd. Will write to you from our new address as soon as I can. Love, Olive & Dale.

Teresa was thinking maybe Olive was mute, or deaf? But what are the odds that Dale was also? Obviously mom had a phone. Maybe they couldn’t afford long distance charges? Maybe Olive picked Oranges for a living?

We are so spoiled today.

Dog with pacifier

Oh, just rinse it off. Good as new,

I can’t believe I hadn’t seen this picture, from 1985- My mom’s dog swiped this pacifier from my niece. He knew exactly what he was doing.

The Who Farted Snow Globe teaser pic

NEW ITEM ALERT: The marketplace is not efficient, We acquired these Who Farted Snowglobes for a most agreeable price, unfortunately they cost a lot to ship, being full of water and whatever those snowflakes are made of.

This snow globe poses more questions than it answers; why is it snowing in the bathroom? Why did the child bring a gas mask into the bath? Was he anticipating an unpleasant smell? If it happens every time he bathes, maybe it’s not a fart smell at all. Does sis keep the cat’s litterbox in the bathroom? There’s your trouble. Click that link to be delighted by our price on this rare and valuable collectible.

P.S. Here are more of our Fart-related items.