“Our evil psycho neighbor, Doris W. of Omaha, NE has been calling us and harassing us for 3 years
by using all kind of phone numbers on her cell phone & then hung up immediately. Continue reading
It does not appear to have been used, however I will wash it repeatedly with chemicals left over from the set of “Breaking Bad” just the same.
The problem with mugs, my wife, instead of reducing her own stuff, she will periodically go through the mugs, and donate most of the ones that she doesn’t personally use. My son’s black “Skull and Crossbone” mug is also at risk.
This makes me wonder, how many times has this “Old Fart” mug cycled through the thrift-store ecosystem? Maybe I should just throw it on the patio cement and put it out of it’s misery.
My name is John- I know a thing or two about Dear John letters. One time my wife wrote me a John Deere letter, and ran off with a tractor salesman. This guy made a serious tactical error, sending a postcard from boot camp to his girl back home, that says “From me to you […]
I was doing this “Power Pose” exercise, but my wife told me to knock it off and take the trash down to the curb.
Her: “Why did this lady take a tiger to the beach?” I take the postcard and stare at it. “There’s a tiger in this picture?” That’s when the trouble started.
We recently saw a documentary on Netflix about tournament Monopoly players, and it inspired us to dust off the old Monopoly board, seeing as how is was miserable out and all four of us were home. Came up with some “house rules” too. That’s when the trouble started…
Having two people with insomnia* makes it worse. Last night, about 2:30, my wife pulls out her favorite Austin Powers quote, saying, “I’ve got a whole bag of “Shhh” with your name on it!”…
I am surprised to have survived the whole Valentine’s Day thing this year.
What happened was, I procrastinated as usual. Went to Safeway after work, and there was another pathetic schlub already frowning at the few remaining cards. Having already gotten Teresa jewelry, I just grabbed some generic heart-shaped box of candy, and selected what I thought was a cute card, which featured Pepe Le Pew, the incurably romantic, possibly French skunk, who falls in love with a cat who somehow manages to get white paint down her back. I was never sure whether he thought she was a skunk, or just had a thing for this cat.
But I digress. Got to the checkstand, and happened to mention there was “Slim Pickings” in the card department. She looks at my card, looks at me, and deadpans; “There weren’t very many cards to choose from, so you got her this one. With a skunk on it.”
My initial reaction was to expound upon the romantic virtues of Pepe Le Pew, but this clerk is of a younger generation, and she was unconvinced.
Since seeing Ferris Bueller’s Day Off in it’s initial theatrical release, so many years ago, I refuse to leave the theater until the screen goes blank for at least two minutes, or the lights go up. This is very annoying to my wife, if she had her way, we would probably have to leave five minutes BEFORE the credits, to “beat the traffic”, a strange concept indeed.
Many movies reward me for my patience; in the 2001 film Ghost World There’s a bit after the credits where Steve Buscemi’s character gets to defeat the clerk in the convenience store altercation. Obviously filmed for a gag, not an alternate scene; but you can tell Buscemi enjoyed it.
Last summer’s Super 8 showed the Super 8 movie the kids in the film were working on, but not until after the lengthy credits. Yet many people left during the credits and missed it entirely. They also wasted most of their popcorn.
What are your favorite post-credit scenes?