Restless Mouse FYI

I would love to help you with your shoddy sneaker scenario, but…

Apparently someone has misunderstood our generous return policy page- We can’t handle returns for the whole world. We received this email in August of 2011;


Dear Teresa,
I had purchased a pair of Dr. Scholl’s sneakers from the¬†Wall mart in Mechanicsburg PA about two weeks ago and I am already having problems with them falling apart and they are not supporting my feet. I am NOT very happy with this product. In my opinion this product is not very good. my old sneakers witch was a K Mart brand held up better than the Dr. Scholl’s.
Thank you for your time. Sincerely, (name withheld)

Maybe she just wanted to get the word out. On the other hand (or foot), I recall getting defective sneakers at K-mart, which I promptly returned. I think all of these cut-rate sneakers are probably made in the same factory, and different labels slapped on them. This is why I usually wear boots.

It’s all fun and games until someone Googles Alexa’s Bing Wiki

Kristen Bell and stink perfume?

Yeah, some times late at night, I google myself. We also use Alexa. Alexa has a little chart with search terms people use to get to our longstanding website (Gradually being overtaken by our new improved store at

Everything seems to be in order here…. Obama Zero Dollar Money, check…. Giant Stuff, sure we sell oversized prop items, and those prop cigars and cigarettes… WAIT A MINUTE…. Kristen Bell?? That makes no sense. I just looked at her wiki page, at the bottom it says she likes sloths. Does that have something to do with it?

I hope my wife doesn’t find out that me and Alexa have been in here googling Kristen Bell’s wiki.

Please help keep “the Mouse” alive..

Won’t you help keep the (restless) mouse alive? Here’s How!

  • Like us, Pin us, tweet and shout. If you mention us on your social media stuff, Google will give us more love too. She’s a fickle mistress.
  • Mention us on your blog, on a buliten board, or other website. That would be awesome.
  • Tell your real life friends too! We usually throw in a free round tuit or other promotional stuff with your order. It’s nice to share!
  • Please use our handy Restless Mouse Contact Form to offer your opinions, advice, or bad jokes.

Monkey Business Merch is in!

We went to Portland yesterday and met up with Mary from the Monkey Business Joke Shop of Lincoln City, we bought out her merchandise. She also found a bunch more crap from her joke shop in addition to the stuff on the list, we have been having fun going through it all. So there will be lots more stuff appearing at, and in our Mystery Grab Bags, at our retail site in The 2 Bits and More Store across from the city hall in Arlington, Wa. and probably on eBaY too.

I also discovered a new traveler’s trick, instead of using roadside rest stops, stop at a Red Lion or other big hotel with a banquet entrance. The bathrooms are much nicer.

Stopped at one yesterday, There was some sort of a Big Important Meeting going on in the banquet hall, and they commenced voting on something, all in favor said Yea but not a peep for the Nay side. I guess it was unanimous. I was tempted to vote nay on general principle but I didn’t want them all to look at me and see I didn’t have a badge. I didn’t even know what was going on there. Since when does that stop me?

What you see is what you get!

Here at the Restless Mouse, “What you see is what you get” – In other words, we strive to describe merchandise accurately and give you a good idea of what you are getting- We are not given to too much hyperbole. If anything, we use hypobole instead. Anyway, our customer satisfaction strategies seem to be working; lots of return customers! I hope you will join our legions of satisfied customers! (OK, maybe “legions” is a little over the top)

Fred Sanford I am not

Two Bits booth version one We rented a space at the Two Bits and More indoor swap meet in Arlington, Washington… It’s right across the street from city hall! I like that.

Haven’t quite got the hang of figuring out how to display things, but I totally rebuilt that rolling cart in the back there… Strutted around Mr. Furley style for a couple days after that accomplishment. As you see, we started out by putting our “Let’s have a garage sale” stuff out there first, gradually infiltrating it with web-store inventory. Have a look, we’re #27 down there, and there’s lots of other fun stuff from the other characters that display their wares at the two bits, it’s great fun and really nice folks there.

This is “version one”, I have some ideas to maximize our tiny 5X6 space.